Calendar is Set!

Well, folks, it would appear that this show is on the road.

I took my first BCP last Friday, and will take my last on the 18th. The goal is to have my suppression check and start stims the week of Thanksgiving, with retrieval the week of December 5th. Ack! I am officially overwhelmed. In a good way, but overwhelmed nonetheless.

We're doing an antagonist protocol, as I mentioned earlier, with Gonal-F and Menopur, then Cetrotide added in, then a Lupron trigger. Know what's awesome about all of that? It's all sub-q. No booty shots until the PIO starts... woohoo! We did decide to go with the PIO, ultimately. I know that studies have shown that endometrin suppositories are equally effective, but I'd rather just do the shots and leave out any of the guess work. Just our personal preference, ultimately.

I'm terrified, excited, overwhelmed, and thankful all at the same time. I'm terrified that CD1 won't come before Thanksgiving and things will be pushed back. Or worse, cancelled. I'm excited to finally be doing something with a greater than 50% chance of success. As high as 70%, even. I'm overwhelmed by the numerous consent forms and list of medications, and amount of money we're spending this month now. But I'm thankful that my clinic was able to get together a plan this quickly, and that my body has been cooperating so far.

The next step is my saline sonogram, on Thursday. One thing I want to make sure to ask is that I'm not slated to take any lupron at the end of this month's cycle as part of the suppression phase... has anyone else had a protocol that left that part out? After that, Dr Boy does an additional SA next week to double check the state of the swimmers. Our meds should arrive in about two weeks, and we have our injection training on the 14th.

Dr Boy is stressed out about all the up-in-the-air nature of this. He's worried he won't be able to cancel clinic the morning of the retrieval or the transfer, and generally stressed out about the cost. I can't blame him. I feel so much guilt that my body has let us down so much that we have to outlay this much time, money, and effort to create a child. That it's stripped us of the spontaneity of making a family. I feel so guilty, and so sad about that. Dr Boy tells me he married ME, not my ovaries, but I still can't help but feel the guilt of it all.

I'll get past it though. Especially when we get our BFP from this. Because we will. Because I can't imagine where we'll be if we don't.