TVT, Turkey Style (CD3)

It's Thought Vomit Thanksgiving, ya'll! I am way too tired from cleaning and baking and organizing and setting up for my visiting family (four staying with us, four in a hotel) to put together more than bullet points today. Though, let's be honest, when do I ever?

- After three injections, I have entered the irrational crying stage of IVF. I cried this morning at how happy I was that everyone was in town. I cried when I got a picture of my dad and brother, who just finished running their first joint 10K. I cried when I started THINKING about how annoyed I am at not being able to watch HIMYM for a while. To be honest though? This irrational crying thing? Makes me feel more like me. So I'm good with it.

- The final weigh-in is complete for my sugar-fast challenge. On Halloween, the first day I abstained, I came in at a shocking 193 lbs. Thank you, two rounds of IUI/injectables, and lots of Mike's Pastry in Boston. And finding consolation in a bottle (ha! *a* bottle) of good wine. And a bag (or two or three) of Trader Joe's white cheddar puffed corn (fake pirate booty). To recap, I'm 5' 8 1/2". Last year at this time, I was 178. Super duper. So.... what does running a 5K and laying off the white stuff for 25 days get you? FIVE POUNDS. Yup, I weighed in at 187.8 this morning. It helps that some of the AF bloat went down too. It's def not where I want to be, but it's a good starting point.

- I went on another baking binge Tuesday night, to make my family think I'm all Suzy Homemaker. I baked chocolate zucchini muffins, pumpkin spice muffins*, GF pumpkin bread, and pumpkin cookies w/cinnamon icing. The most impressive part of that was actually cooking all the damn deliciously battered items without tasting A SINGLE MORSEL OF BATTER. Or finished product. Until yesterday.

- Apparently, there are a few of you out there that like me! I've been bestowed the Liebster Award! Apparently, Liebster means "dearest" in German. This one has been floating around the blogosphere this week, going to folks with less than 200 followers. I received it from three other awesome ladies whose blogs I *love* to see pop up on my unread reader list. Rebeccah from Pink Lipgloss and Prenatals, Oak from Acorn Chronicles, and Kelly from Team Baby are all rockstars themselves, and I VERY much appreciate knowing that they enjoy my thought vomit! They've all been great support so far in this IVF journey, as have the rest of you!

Here are the rules to pass this baby on: 

1. Thank the giver and link back to the blogger who gave it to you.

2. Reveal your top five picks and let them know by leaving a comment on their blog.
3. Copy and paste the award on your blog.

4. Hope that the people you’ve sent the award to forward it to their five favorite bloggers and keep it going!

 

Here are 5 bloggers I would like to pass the award on to:

1. Lauren, from Not Just An Army Wife (she barely squeaks in at 195 followers!)

2. Lauren, from The Army Doctor's Wife and P(c)OS Ovaries

3. Megan, from This Space for Rent

4. The lovely Waiting and Wishing

5. Emily, from A Peek into our Journey

 

These ladies are all truly wonderful, and deserve a good look! They'll crack you up and make you cry, all at the same time. Or maybe that's just me.... 

Anyways, Happy Thanksgiving!!! And to those of you *not* celebrating Thanksgiving, Happy Thursday!

*One box spiced cake mix, one can of pumpkin, 1/2 cup water. Bake according to the directions on the box, add a minute or two of baking time. Thanks, Lauren, for the recipe!!! She also suggests you add a decadent cream cheese frosting... hold me...

TVT

- I am tired of sugar-fasting. TIRED OF IT AND I WANT TO EAT SUGAR DAMNIT. Yeah, that's one of them. Today completes day eleven. My goal to stay off the white stuff until I start stims? In a perfect world, that's fourteen days away. I'm not even halfway through. I caught myself staring at the candy bars in the snack shack at the work kitchen today while my lunch was in the microwave. Sad. I'm hoping this is just the hard part getting past the hump and then it'll be smooth sailing. Jamima said it worked that way for her. Dear god please let this get easier.

- I am so effing antsy to start stims. Or more accurately, to get my damned period, which will mark when I'm able to start stims. I don't know if it's because I started BCPs on CD20ish, without a bleed, because there was no ovarian activity, but MAN, my ute feels ready to burst. 8 more pills. And seriously? I wouldn't be surprised if AF makes me pay for the fact that I'm trying to make it my last for a year.

- Meds arrive tomorrow. ALL of them, apparently. Unless we need refills, of course. I talked to the pharmacy today and it looks like they did order my post-transfer stuff along with everything else. So the cheapie price? Wow. Happy times.

- Our power finally came back on at 11pm last night. We forgot to turn off all the lights, so we were thrown from sleep into a VERY WELL LIT HOUSEHOLD. I think we'll do a better job at not leaving all the lights on in the house from now on ;)

- On that note, we DID manage to cut our gas/electric bill in half this month! To be fair, weather permitted us to not turn on the heat OR the a/c a single time, but still... I'm happy! That certainly won't be the case this month, as it's been flippin' frigid. Because yes, 38 degrees in the morning is frigid to this CA wuss.

- I have tomorrow off... thanks a ton, Veterans! No seriously, thank you. You are awesome. All of you who ARE, or have significant others who are members of our armed forces, you are ridiculously awesome, and I wish I could thank every single one of you.

- I have tomorrow off, thank god because I might damn well murder one of my colleagues. It's a boys club in the office. I'm the only woman who works there, aside from our admin assistant. There's lots of douche-baggery that goes on, and I don't always feel very included. Today especially. Effers.

Vomit on, folks!

TVT

Happy Thursday! It's that time of the week again! Say thanks to Oak for providing the vomititious kid in the pic!

- One of my cats is currently chasing her tail. Through the hole in a level of her cat tree. Because if you can't SEE that it's attached, it must NOT be attached. We breed winners over here.

Whaaaat? Don't judge me!

- Had my saline sono today. I didn't take the recommended 600-800mg advil. Honestly, it wasn't awful. The catheter that they insert into the uterus is the same size as what they use for an IUI, so that wasn't bad. They use the speculum to crank 'er open to insert it, then toss it in and measure how deep your ute is, then carefully remove the speculum and replace it with 'ol wandy. Next, they hook the end of the catheter up to a plunger full of saline and toss it all in while they watch on the screen. Everything looked good, no septum, no nada. A "perfectly hospitable looking womb".  Yay my womb! I'm still pretty crampy, but then again I definitely pushed it tonight in terms of activity.

- I wore the awesome socks in the middle of this picture to the appointment today. They were given to me by the AWESOME Emily, who just so happens to be a 7 or 8 weeks into a successful IVF pregnancy... with triplets! She wore a pair of socks like the ones on the left to a transfer of hers, and I mentioned how much AWESOME I think she had on her feet. And you know what happened next? She mailed me a few pairs of AWESOME to put on MY feet! She's awesome. I'm saving the Mary Janes for the retrieval or transfer... can't decide which.

- I saw a double rainbow after my saline sono this afternoon. I didn't know what it meant.

- Went to an infertility support group meeting tonight (part of the reason I pushed it tonight) with The Womb Warrior and others. As usual, it was truly wonderful to see others going through similar circumstances and to hear their stories. The blogging and tweeting community are AMAZING, but there really is just something to face-to-face contact.

'till next time.... Vomit On!

More Vomit.

I forgot to mention that TVT is brought to you courtesy of Natalie. She's hilarious.

And this kid?

This is Mac. He's Oat's. She's pretty damn funny too. And she makes me feel better about my love of alcohol.

And on to business.

- Had my CD12 u/s yesterday after 9 days of menopur shots. Drumroll please... NO follies over 8mm. Amazing... just like LAST TIME! Oh, and my estradiol is only 72. I'm still fine, mentally (at least about this cycle), since it's so much like last time. Sure, I've got 3 extra vials of menopur floating around in my belly from upping the first 3 days dose, but otherwise? Same shiz different month. Next appt is on Monday.

- Phlebotomist had to draw blood out of the back of my hand. Not conducive to getting a hand massage from Dr Boy. He was gentle though :) Dr Boy, not the phlebo-guy.

- Two pregnancy announcements yesterday. One from a co-worker, and one BAM! facebook ultrasound pic of the kid waving. This is #2 for work guy. We talked about our IF a little after he asked when *I* was going to be making a preggo announcement. At first, I thought "Oh gee, glad people think the IF weight makes me look pregnant". Then I just realized it's because I swoon over the pics of his daughter all the time. He and his wife had three 1st tri miscarriages before their 1st, and are just grateful that things are moving along smoothly so far with TTC #2. The facebook one was a friend from college, who I was actually surprised hadn't gotten knocked up sooner. That one hurt way more than the colleague. I had just gotten home from my dr appt and was telling Dr Boy about the results as I mindlessly floated through facebook. And got this: 

And started crying. It was good times.

- My pregnancy announcement mantra has become "Happy for them, sad for me." I say it a lot.

- At least the weekend won't suck because I have a wine club event tonight in Napa, a fabulous infertility shower thrown by The Womb Warrior tomorrow, and a fancy pants dinner where they talk about cooking your meal and do everything in front of you. So I will be too busy to stalk all the congrats comments on the FB post, yeah?

- I am over the menopur. I know I said it yesterday, but I am so over shots. 

- I got accepted to the BlogHer ad network. Click away!!!

Have a great weekend, 'yall!

Thought Vomit ThursFriday

Thurs-Friday is kindof like brunch or linner, a little bit of both worlds :)

- Had an awful time getting to my u/s appt Tuesday. Between the impossible task of finding a parking spot, not knowing which building the dr was located in (different location than usual), ending up floating around the maternity wards (yes, that really happened), and nearly having a breakdown when I checked in 15 minutes late, I finally made it. Hardly still sane, but made it.

- The u/s showed no follie activity yet. Nothing over 7mm, after 6 days of shots. Whatevs. There weren't any last time around, it just rules out this cycle moving along any faster than last time, really. On one hand, it should still be fine because we did end up with a good, ovulating, follie last time. On the other, it didn't end up making me a baby. So I'm still a bit jaded and disconnected from this cycle a bit more, mentally at least.

- Shots 8 and 9 hurt like a bitch. And bruised. I am so over this. But I can't complain about them too much bc Dr Boy feels like I'm bitching about HIM and the way HE injects me. Which I'm not, I'm just bitching about it in general. Sigh.

- I'm pissed that this cycle isn't moving faster bc it means we won't be able to fit in a third before we leave for Boston and VT in mid-Oct. Because yes, I'm already thinking about next time. I told you I was feeling disconnected about this cycle. Maybe a quick month off would be good though, I don't know. Give my body a chance to relax a little (I hear relaxing gets you pregnant) and lose the 8 lbs I've gained in the last 6 weeks. What the hell am I saying, I'm going to be pissed if this time doesn't work and we have to waste more time. Pissed.

- I'm attempting to cut out processed sugar, at least for a little bit. I was less than 1 lb shy of 190 when I stepped on the scale yesterday, and that is UNACCEPTABLE. Ohhhhhhhhh no. Mmmm mmmmm. I'm taking the AA "one day at a time" approach. I can refrain from peanut m&m's and Grandmother's peanut butter cookies from the snack shack TODAY. I can say no to the skinny cow ice cream sandwich TODAY. I can give away the chocolate brownies left over from our BBQ TODAY. What did Dr Boy say last night? "We need more good dessert options up in this house." Ha. Get used to it.

- I'm fairly certain the low-sugar deal will only last up until my next BFN. Here's hoping, though.

- I am planting beets and lettuce in my fall garden. About to give up on my peppers and zucchini. It's been a bad year for peppers in my 'hood, and I can't seem to get the zucc's any bigger than 4" before they start to turn yellow. Very odd. I thought they grew like weeds!!! Tomatoes are still going strong though. Yum-tastic.

- My self-esteem lately has been ROCK BOTTOM. This one deserves its own post though. Just thought I'd throw it out there.

I have another u/s this afternoon. Hopefully we'll see something more interesting, since it IS CD12 and all.

That is all.

Thought Vomit Thursday

Yes, I know it's Friday, but as Oak and Natalie have said numerous times, there are no rules to TVT! The only rule of TVT is to spew whatever's on your mind at the time, and to use bullets.

Here I go!

- My boobs started hurting yesterday, which makes me fairly certain that I ovulated on Wednesday right on schedule for the IUI. This makes me happy :) It also leads me to believe that my corpus luteum is doing what it's supposed to, becoming a little progesterone factory until something else can take over. There's hope for me yet! (all that to say i'm 2dpo)

- I'm hpt-ing until I get a solid BFN, just so I know for certain that the HCG trigger has left my bloodstream. I've done two so far, both positive. It's a little unnerving getting a BFN for the first time ever- even though I know it's a big fat lie. I don't mind wasting the tests, because we all know I'm crazy and have a zillion of them.

- My life has been forever changed by this post. Mind. Blown.

- I would really love for the stim-bloat to GO the eff AWAY. I'm still up a solid 5 pounds from the day I took my first shot, 16 days ago.

- I'm hosting a Labor Day BBQ next weekend. That means that lots of people will be in my house. Which means I should probably finish unpacking all the boxes that I've avoided for the last four months. To motivate ourselves, we decided that we'd hire a house-cleaning service to do the cleaning as long as ALL THE BOXES ARE UNPACKED. I made the appt, so I now have a LOT to do in the next week.

- I'm hosting a Labor Day BBQ next weekend. That also means I need to buy a big folding table so I can actually serve people food. I also want to make sangria, so I need a dispenser for that too. Any suggestions.

- Related, I am in need of a good sangria recipe. STAT.

That's all the vom I've got for now. If you're on the east coast, enjoy Irene! I wish I were there to experience it too.

Have a great weekend everyone!