Friday, December 16, 2011

Freeze Report and Why Early Testing is the Devil (6dp5dt)

So last I left you to take a gander at my right column dealio to decipher what we ended up freezing from this cycle. To recap, we still had 17 embies growing on the day of transfer. We transferred two, leaving 15 to continue growing and makin' da behbehs for us.

Our clinic will only freeze (or at least in our case) once an embie hits blasts. They'll give them until day 7 to do so, then call it quits. I called on Monday afternoon (day 7), and found out that 5 embies had hit blast by Sunday and were frozen, and another three caught up on Monday and were added to our lot.

We have 8 snowy embies! Snowbies! If you look at it as 8 out of the 36 that were retrieved, it's kind of depressing knowing that we lost about 75% of what was gathered. On the other hand, we TRANSFERRED TWO AND HAVE EIGHT FROZEN.

That maketh me happy. So do these slippers. Though not in the same way.
Gratuitous PDLAMBLATI. Noone's lookin' at my business,
but they sure are warm and cozy and cute.

Onto the devil sticks. I was emboldened by the success of Rebecca at Pink Lipgloss and Prenatals, whose trigger never tested out. She's had some great beta's and has her first u/s next week :) Awesome!

But anywho, I thought, well, I had some pretty good uterine cramping at 1, 2, and 3 dp5dt (days past a day 5 transfer). No implantation spotting, but that doesn't always happen. I had two GREAT looking embies transferred. Since about Tuesday (hmmmm, the first day I went back to work with a 6am start time) I've been reaching my awake limit at about noon. Right around there, I hit a point where my eyeballs burn and it literally hurts to keep them open. So much so that putting cold spoons on them sounds absolutely divine. Also, no matter what I eat, I get heartburn. Not awful, but definitely makes me think twice about snacking on anything other than cool water.

That's it though. Exhaustion, which can be explained away by lots of activity after lots of inactivity, and heartburn that can be explained away by unhealthy snacking. (though dude, even my dinner salad made me burny)

So I tested yesterday at 5dp5dt. Nothing. I had an incredibly vivid dream just before I woke up, where I just knew I was pregnant. Absolute, one hundred percent certainty. I felt so FULL. Full of everything that I can imagine it would feel like to finally have this happen for us. So Right. Perfect. I woke up still holding onto that feeling, and couldn't keep myself away from the devil sticks.

And I tested again today at 6dp5dt. Nothing. I again dreamt, this time of a co-worker announcing that his wife, whom I met on Tuesday, was pregnant. And due tomorrow. Holy hell, that one sent me into the breakroom in tears. In the dream, of course.

And tomorrow, I will test again. Because really, I've already broken the seal on this round and once you start, you just can't damn well stop before the beta, right? (sunday) But I'm breaking out the Big Guns. I have six First Response Early Results, the Rolls Royce of pee sticks according to Mo.

Please hold me. I'm finally on the doubt side of the roller coaster, and it feels like shit.

8 comments:

  1. Nooo don't go down the doubt side of the roller coaster yet! Testing early IS the devil. Keep hoping!!! And HOLY COW 8 snow babies?? That's amazing :) I will be crossing my everything for you on Sunday...

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  2. I cant wait to hear if the FR treat you better this morning! AND I'm totally jealous that your beta is on Sunday- I have to wait until Tuesday, which might as well be sometime next year!!!!! Thinking of you- GOOD LUCK!!!

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  3. Ugh, sorry for your BFN! Not everyone gets positives early like I did. Only one more day until beta, you can hold out!

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  4. Ahh fuck....hang in there, missy. Fx'd from you. It's still early.

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  5. It's still early! I also got a negative at 11 dp retrieval. Hoping that you bring us good news today or tomorrow!!

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  6. Too early! Too early! I tested on 10 DP-IUI and it was negative. On 12 DP-iui I got my faint positive.

    BUT, if this cycle does turn out to be a bust: lay in your tub, eat pizza, drink wine, and look forward to those snowbies! 8! That's a lot! I'm holding out hope for you friend. *hugs*

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  7. I would test every other day if you are intent on testing. It's not good to get those negatives when you could very well be carrying a baby!
    And 8 'frosties' as I call them, is awesome! I only ended up with 3.
    Good luck!

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  8. Dude, you should totally know better! NEVER test early unless you're using the Rolls Royce! :-P
    crossing fingers, toes, and everything else

    xoxo

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You know you want to tell me how ridiculous I am...