Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Naked. In the Backyard.

(Otherwise known as "I am my father's daughter")

Yesterday was a good, productive day. I ran some errands on the way home from vanpool, needing some additional groceries (milk and cheese) for a new recipe I wanted to try for dinner. I really wanted to get a jump start on cooling when I got home, as I planned on making some freezer meals (banana nut muffins and twice-baked potatoes) too. Ended up pulling up to the house at around 5pm, not too shabby, I thought!

Then I realized. My neighbors had my house keys (from petsitting over the weekend). The spare set? Sitting on the key hook. In the house. Locked out. The key-wielding neighbors weren't home, and Dr Boy was 40 minutes away.

1. It was not cool out. It was not warm out. It was HOT out. The hottest day of the year so far.

2. I was wearing my best Pioneer Woman impersonation getup- floral tunic top, jeggings, and brown boots. Not the best choice for a triple-digit day. Already sweating because of the errands and hot cars and the like.

I couldn't justify running the A/C in the car for 45 minutes, so I did what any respectable floozy woman does- stripped down to a tanktop and underwear and hung out in the backyard. And called Dr Boy to come home, STAT. And watered the garden. And tweeted.

Dr Boy came home rather quickly and was horrified to see me lounging so immodestly in the yard. "What if the neighbor's popped by?????" Really? They've never just "popped by" before! The fences would have kept anyone from calling the cops on me. It was quite freeing, actually.

I told my mom about it this morning, and she just laughed. My father is a bit absent-minded when it comes to stuff like that too (not the clothing-optional part, just the keys/wallet/watch kind of thing), and she said it sounded just like him. Guess I'm not a milkman baby!

While waiting in the yard I did get to see a pretty gnarly squirrel fight- three of them flailing about in one of the trees next to the fence. One of them had a giant nutsac. It was not pretty. (before you judge me from checking out the squirrel's nads, I swear, you couldn't NOT see them. They were HEEEE-YOOOGE) I wish I had had the fancy-pants camera.

So that was my evening. I still made the muffins and potatoes and dinner (including this beet and goat cheese risotto which was phenomenal). Triumph!

I'm about to head out to my first visit with the new IF doctors. Wish me luck!

Oh yeah- and did I mention today I'm 14DPO? Not pregnant. Another BFN. I cried over it when I tested prematurely on Sat, so I'm over the mega-emotional part. On to the next cycle. With my new Drs.


  1. I did something similar once. I decided to get a blow up pool and put it in my back yard. It was super hot, so I opted to wear my bikini. I was using my car's a/c adaptor to blow up said pool. Without thinking, I locked my house, and shut and locked my car. With the car on and running. I had to walk to the bar near my house, IN MY BIKINI, go inside and use the phone to call my parents to get the spare key. Just know you're not alone.

  2. Sorry about the BFN. Hope the new docs have a solid plan.

    A milkman's baby? Ha Ha Ha! I am glad you were resourceful in your attempts to beat the heat!

    iclw #36

  3. This post was hilarious, well except for the bfn (hugs).

    So glad you could cool off while being locked out of the house.

    Hoping the appointment with the new doctor goes really well!

    visiting from ICLW

  4. I absolutely adored your post - you have a very natural way of telling a story. It was quite funny :)

    I hope your appointment went well.

    Hugs from ICLW

  5. Hi from ICLW!! That was too funny! It totally sounds like something I would do! I love saying that my hubby is the milkman's baby because his dad was actually a milkman at one point. He doesn't think its that funny, but I get a kick out of it :)

  6. ICLW #56

    My husband has locked himself out of the house - his solution is to break a window (and it's a good thing my parent install windows for a living). We installed a code box for the garage to prevent anymore broken windows.

  7. Visiting from ICLW!

    Hope everything went well at your appointment with the new doctor. Wishing you much success in your IF journey.

  8. Hello from ICLW! I hope that the new doctor had some more promising thoughts on how to approach everything. Chin up! And I love that you just stripped down to skivvies to cool off. Totally something I would never have the guts to do. :)

  9. Your post gave me a much-needed laugh. I think it was the squirrel nutsack line that did it for me. Thank you! :)

    I'm very sorry about your BFN. Wishing you lots of luck with the new doctors.

    ICLW #144

  10. Oh my lol You still had more coverage than most bathing suits provide! Good for you for liberating yourself amidst the swelter!

    I'm sorry about the BFN, hopefully your new doctor will have some wonderful magic and insight.


    Life in the White House


You know you want to tell me how ridiculous I am...