Friday, May 16, 2014

Bad news, bad news

I've been having some pretty severe cramping on and off for a week now. The anxiety of this cycle was seriously making me crazy, and I felt on the verge of a panic attack pretty much constantly. Yesterday I called the clinic, and played up the "do I have an ectopic???" angle, which honestly, was a pretty big concern given the roller coaster betas and cramping. They had me come in today. Dr Boy had to work, so I was solo.

Two empty sacs. Two. Empty. Measured ~6mm each. Two. Same size, so they really did implant around the same time, like I thought they had the night of and day after transfer. They just suck, so nothing grew other than the sac. I'm only 5w6d today, so there is still a chance, albeit extraordinarily small, that something could grow out of this. There could maybe possibly still be a happy ending. But the look on the RE's face really told it all- there is nothing short of a miracle that will bring these babies home to my arms.

At this point, the gestational sac should be 15mm or larger, with a yolk sac, and in most cases, a fetal pole. With the mini Meier, we saw a heartbeat today.


So yeah. What are the odds... two. two empty sacs.

I'm strangely calm about it now, but so, so very heartbroken.

7 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry. :( Thinking of you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm really glad you're back, I've randomly thought about you here and there and wondered how you were doing. I'm sorry you're back on this note though. Wish it didn't have to be like this --- IF sucks!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'm so sorry. Sending nothing but love and hugs your way!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Wow..that was a lot of information all at once ;-) Sorry to hear the news, but definitely holding out hope for you!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Thank goodness you're back! I just wish it were under different circumstances. I know how much hope it takes to keep riding the ART train and it's times like these that really test you. I'm really sorry for what you are going through. Take care hon.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Picked today to visit after way too long and saw this. :( I'm so sorry. (like that helps, I know.)

    ReplyDelete

You know you want to tell me how ridiculous I am...